Governor Benny Served Barnacles to a Visiting Ambassador and Called Them a Delicacy. The Silence Lasted Four Minutes.

The courier from the Founders Archipelago arrived early this morning. The goat was on it. The quartermaster had specifically written to the harbor at the other end requesting, in terms I will not reproduce here, that the goat not be placed on the courier. The harbor wrote back. Their letter arrived on the same vessel. With the goat.

SNORKELBOOTS BAY

Governor Benny arrived at SnorkelBoots Bay two days ago. He has not been idle.

A crewless vessel appeared in the harbor without explanation. Benny sent a team below decks. Behind a false wall in the captain’s cabin they found a chest of gold and navigation charts. He has not disclosed their contents. A forged edict ring was uncovered the same afternoon. He imposed summary punishments. The forgery attempts collapsed after the first arrests.

The notable event, however, was the banquet. A visiting ambassador was expected for a diplomatic reception. The crabs intended for the occasion had not arrived. Governor Benny presented barnacles and called them a local delicacy. The ambassador recognized them immediately. The silence at the table lasted four minutes. The courier has confirmed this figure independently.

Smoke from new construction is visible above SnorkelBoots Bay. The Harbor Board described the pace of development as “notable.” The harbor watch reports that Benny has begun arming vessels. The purpose has not been stated.

Eighty

Governor BigChris’s weekly engagement total has risen from sixty-one to eighty since yesterday’s dispatch. The increase of nineteen belongs, in its entirety, to one governor. He has also colonised two further islands, bringing his total to thirteen. Governor Darren remains at forty-three. A dock worker described Darren’s fleet as “parked.” He was asked if he meant at rest. He said he meant parked.

The compact called First remains at six. The trader at the central market has brought a chair. He is still watching the alliance registry. Nothing has changed. He seems less confident than last week.

The First Morning at RogueRig Fort

Governor Windy Walrus made landfall early this morning. Within hours he had dealt with a loose parrot in the settlement and a thief at the docks. He caged the parrot. He hanged the thief.

One clerk at the Harbor Board was observed putting down his pen for a moment. He picked it up again. He did not comment.

Animals and Miracles

The roosters at SoggyTrident Gate had been fighting. Two champion bloodlines, two rival factions, one territorial dispute that had consumed the village for days. Governor BigChris’s solution was to crossbreed them. The roosters fought on sight. Both factions blamed the Governor. He has not apologized.

Elsewhere, Governor Darren declared a weeping statue at Emerald Bay to be a miracle and welcomed pilgrims. Donations poured in. Then the pipe burst during a packed service, spraying the front three rows. The pilgrimage ended. Darren has not issued a statement. A harbor official said only that the plumbing at Emerald Bay “has always been ambitious.”

Meanwhile, Governor Capn Kid at SkullSlug Cove diverted the millstream to flush a rat infestation from his cellars. The rats scattered. The grain stores did not survive. He has requested no assistance. The Harbor Board has noted this.

Other Business

The goat, having arrived on the courier for the second time in three dispatches, was observed eating a notice pinned to the harbor board. The notice was a formal request from the quartermaster asking that the goat be prevented from boarding courier vessels. The quartermaster has been informed. He has asked that I not describe his reaction. I have agreed to this.

Jenkins claims to have seen Governor Grinning Guppy’s settlement from the courier deck as it passed through the eastern channel. He said it looked “promising.” Jenkins last used this word about a fishing outpost that subsequently caught fire. The Harbor Board has noted his observation and filed it accordingly.

Filed from the Harbor Board, Founders Archipelago.